Where to Buy a Bermuda Visa (And How Much It Costs)

Hey there, let me tell you, getting a Bermuda visa ain’t as hard as milking a stubborn cow. I heard some folks talking ’bout it down at the market, and it got me thinking. Seems like lots of people want to go to that Bermuda place. Sounds fancy, huh? So, I did some digging, you know, like a hen looking for worms. And let me tell you, it ain’t rocket science.

First thing, if you’re from ‘Merica, you’re in luck! You folks don’t need no Bermuda visa to go there. Just hop on a plane and go. Lucky ducks! But for the rest of us, it’s a little more work, but not too bad.

Now, they say you need some papers. Like, you gotta have a passport. And that passport, it can’t be expiring soon. They say it needs to last at least six more months. Six months! Can you believe it? Mine’s older than my grandson, but it still works, so why six months? Makes no sense to me, but those are the rules, I reckon.

And then you gotta show ’em you got a ticket to go back home. They don’t want you staying there forever, I guess. Makes sense, everyone’s gotta have a home, right? So, you gotta buy a ticket that shows you’re going back to where you came from. Or going somewhere else, as long as you ain’t staying in Bermuda forever, it is okay. They call it a “return or onward ticket.”

They also want to know where you gonna sleep. You can’t just sleep on the beach, I reckon, though it might be nice. They say you need “details of accommodation.” So, you gotta book a hotel or something. Or maybe you can stay with some friends. As long as you got a place to lay your head, that’s all they care about, I guess.

Now, here’s the kicker. If your country ain’t one of them special ones that don’t need no Bermuda visa, then you might need this other thing. They call it a “multi re-entry visa,” or MRV, for the UK. Don’t ask me what that means, I just know you might need it. Something about being able to go in and out of the UK many times, I think. Lord knows why you’d want to do that, but that’s what they say. I only been to the UK one time. Not that many cows there.

And this whole Bermuda visa thing, it only lasts for six months. Six months! What are you gonna do in six months? Plant a whole garden? Raise a family of chickens? Seems like a long time to me. But maybe some folks just like to stay in one place for a while.

They say it takes two whole weeks to get this Bermuda visa. Two weeks! That’s a long time to wait for a piece of paper. What are they doing, writing it with a feather pen? In my day, we didn’t have to wait two weeks for nothing. If you need something, you get it right away. Or just wait a little time, not that long.

Here’s the gist of it, all boiled down like making jam:

• Americans, you’re good. No Bermuda visa needed.
• Passport needs to last six more months.
• Need a ticket to go back home or somewhere else.
• Gotta have a place to stay – a hotel or something.
• Might need that fancy UK visa thing, the MRV.
• Bermuda Visa is good for six months.
• Takes two weeks to get the visa.

So, if you’re planning on going to Bermuda, you better get on it! Don’t wait till the last minute, or you might miss out. And don’t forget that COVID thing. They still worried about that, I guess. Heard you need some kind of test. NAAT or PCR or LAMP, I don’t know what those mean. Sounds like some newfangled contraptions to me. Just make sure you got all your ducks in a row before you go, that’s what I always say.

They also say you can stay there without a Bermuda visa for like 180 days in a year. That is a lot of days! And if you want to stay longer or work or study, then I guess you need different papers. That’s a whole other can of worms, though. I ain’t going there to work, just to see what all the fuss is about.

Well, that’s all I know about this Bermuda visa business. Hope it helps you some. It ain’t as complicated as it sounds, just a lot of hoops to jump through. But if you really want to go to Bermuda, I reckon it’s worth it. Just remember what I told you, and you’ll be fine. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I gotta go tend to my garden. These tomatoes ain’t gonna pick themselves!